reasons i can never say.

I write because I can't say.

that is why I write to you,
because I can't say those words.

But I don't want to make you sad.
I hope you too won't make me sad.

-scribbles in the little black book during physics yesterday.

and in amazement.

Alert: Major Exam around the corner. In less than 2 weeks, to be exact. And I'm still here. -insert cheeky, mischievous grin & semi frown face-

Yesterday, I manage to finish mission #1. Thank you miss cousin for helping out! Hopefully you'll like it.
yesterday, I sat down and wrote the long blog post with sherina. (:
yesterday, someone said someone injured himself. why lar you? Ask your Einstein brother to take care of you. xD
yesterday, the cousin and her friend came over.
yesterday, was the first day of a good friend's major exam.
yesterday, you made me sigh.

and today,
hopefully it'll be a better day. for you, for me and for the whole wide world!

off to study moral. (:

I'm a high school student with a college student ID number. (;

will i leave without you?

I cleared the path before me,
but I don't intend in walking down that road anytime soon.
Perhaps after a month or two,
after the final, hardest goodbye said to you;
you'll see me taking off.
but, I hope to see you down the road.
or shall we walk down that path, together?
- I don't want to say goodbye to you.

you're my hardest adieu.

am i living off the edge?

good night.


and you left me hanging...

knit us tightly together.

dearest youth,

shall we all squeeze into the back of a truck,
and make our way down the country side;
shall we sing along to the rhythm of our heartbeat,
and laugh like we've never laughed before.
and because this is us,
shall we make history together?
-from me to all of you.

you, play the violin so cutely!

you never fail to make me laugh and always going the extra mile,
just to make me smile.
I thank you for being such a great blessing and friend,
I'm sure you'll grow up to be a fine gentleman.
& you're my teddy bear buddy! (:
-this, to joel c.

of secret codes and every other secrets shared,
I hope I didn't made you mad.
you've been a great and best friend,
I hope this would not come to an end.
thank you, dear friend for every moment shared.
-this, to sherina.

a sweet young lady, a smart school student.
a pretty little girl, a cute little sister.
I have no other words to describe you,
but you've definitely grown into a matured fine lady.
you; always make our days with your cute, funny gestures and traits.
-this, to yiyi.

the name might be common,
but the person is definitely special.
from playing the piano to solving puzzling questions,
will you be the next Einstein?
or would you rather continue to be our very own monkey king?
-this, to joel g.

you are ever so compassionate,
always trying to help out in times of need.
I'm sorry if I didn't appreciate,
but I hope we'll never part at the same place we met.
-this, to joshua.

I don't quite know your name,
for you have many to contain.
is it crab? or is it chicken wing?
Although I used to be pretty afraid of you,
thank you for every ride to and fro.
-this, to gabriel.

bzzz..bzzz...aren't those what a bee does?
they buzz by, making those buzz noise.
but you, on the other hand;
have not only buzz by our lives,
you've stayed with us, through thick and thin.
and you're definitely a great sister!
stay strong and be courageous in all you do for He will lead you.
-this, to bibi.

from R to L,
form the right to the left;
you've always been there.
from playing the piano gracefully to baking a tasty cake,
what more you can't do?
-this, to rachel.

this girl,
sometimes we see you, and sometimes we don't.
whatever happens, I hope you would be able to join us more often in the coming future.
take care and God bless you always!
-this, to vivian.

although we may not converse much,
but you too, have been a great blessing to us all.
you and your nickname,
never fail to make us laugh.
God bless you and take care okay?
-this, to wee zcent.

someone so far away,
yet so near.
you're a little bit of a big brother, a little bit of a friend, a little bit of an adviser
and you're definitely a little bit of a great leader.
I hope you're enjoying your time over there!
Have fun.
-this, to wee ric.

A little brother, not very little.
A young man, not very big.
Shall I call you a boy?
Although we may not be very close,
but do join us more often okay?
We're always happy to have you around.
-this, to eu mun.

she said: happy birthday. 21 years old already right?
he said: yea, legal to enter the casino already.
you're like a long lost-long time no see kind of big brother,
so here's to a wonderful 21st year!
-this, to richard.
(and that's not my baby! xD)

I'm sorry for all that I've done wrong,
but you've been a great leader!
Perhaps I would have to say goodbye one day,
but I hope that this friendship will always stay.
and thank you for the times you've been with us!
-this, to esther.

from someone so quiet,
to someone so caring.
from someone who i barely knew,
to someone who is always there for us.
indeed, you're a very caring little man.
-this, to chee kent.
(i remember the times in cameron, when you insisted on buying more food for eu mun :])

you're a seventeen year old young lady,
with jars of happiness and dashes of love.
you've been missing a lot lately and I feel bad for not noticing,
but whatever it is, I hope that we'll always be friends.
-this, to evelyn.

It feels like having a big sister watching over us from far.
you always perform your dance gracefully,
like a flawless ballerina twirling around on the stage.
I guess that is why you're so graceful,
because that is your name, grace! =)

although you always say you're 20++ and a few more +,
we've never thought of you as someone older.
you're just like a big sister,
and us, being your little siblings.
thank you for all your guidance and care,
you've truly been a great blessing!
-this, to lai ming.

my dear yeye,
you're not that old after all.
you are always so full with your own thoughts and traits,
and I hope you'll join us more often, okay?
thank you yeye for that cute birthday present last year.
-this, to kalven.

the both of you,
one always so jovial, another always on the go.
but, both always so concern about us.
thank you to the both of you!
glad to have you two around.
-this, to chen hooi and chee hon.

you, always like to make jokes.
sometimes it makes sense and sometimes it doesn't.
but above all matters, you're a very talented boy.
use your talents, serve Him and always be a blessing to the rest, will you?
-this, to jonathan.

who else to turn to but you when it comes to badminton?
thank you for 'coaching' us few and
thank you for being a big brother to us all.
whose name do we mention when asked about the perhaps most matured guy among us?
I guess, without a doubt, your name!
-this, to chee kean.

from playing the guitar to playing the piano,
I guess you've been the cause of heartbreaks among many young girls? haha
you're not only like a big brother,
you're also a great friend.
I'm really glad that you're a part of us. (:
-this, to chee meng.

you, are a wonderful friend.
not only always going the extra mile in helping everyone out;
you're also caring and friendly.
thank you for all the memories we shared
and I'll definitely remember the young times we had.
-this, to aaron.

last but not least, you!

I will never forget the night we spent together.
the night when we couldn't sleep,
the night when it was so cold up in cameron's,
and the night that you stayed up with the both of us.
you're the only boy I've had this kind of girly conversations with,
and truth be told, I really really enjoyed your company!
& all secrets kept between us, right?
you, are an amazing brother and good friend.
with your humour and funny side, we always enjoy having you around.
shall we have more of these nights? ;)
-this, to my girl talk buddy, sheng jian.

all of you really mean something to me.
the above might not be much, but I really enjoy each and everyone of you.
and I thank God for all of you.

more happy moments together? (:

*sprinkles love to all of you*

my hardest goodnight?

你
心动了吗?

you caught me off guard.

I used to think you were just an illusion,
a confusing yet sweet illusion.
but now i know, you're not an illusion,
you're something so different,
you sure know how to surprise me.
- last night. (:

hey you. yes, you. I'm talking to you. Never thought you would enjoy badminton, would you? yea, I never thought I would enjoy that game of hitting, smashing and seeing a shuttlecock fly in mid-air. (: but I dare say I enjoyed it after yesterday. After church yesterday, on the contrary to what the cousin did, I went for badminton with the youth. I'm as hopeless as someone could get when it comes to badminton and aku memang tak tahu pasal permainan ini. jadi, macam mana nak main? but after a while and after many 'coaches', I got the hang of it and started enjoying myself.

And many many thanks to those who taught me, who beared with me and who willingly played with me. thank you! 谢谢您! terima kasih! merci! danke! ありがとうございました! 감사합니다!! grazie! (;

we then celebrated 4 people's belated/early birthday. but, sorry to someone because i fail to do something for you. ): got back home and tried to take a nap, but someone persistently prevented me from falling asleep. another *insert frown face here*

got ready and went to a church member's place for bbq dinner. Though my friends weren't there except for the two brothers, it was good. And thank you to the two brothers for talking to me!

But, I sure was surprised by what you did and you really caught me off guard.

on another happy note,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RICHARD!
(:

Have a happy happy birth-day and may you enjoy your 21st year.
God bless you always.

like you said, 21 years old already, legal age to enter the casino already. =)

where does boredom take you tonight?

-insert usual tag rules- (:
tagged by sherina.

1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be? take revenge?
:: Ask him what he thinks I should to do to him. then,I'll judge. *evil grin*

2. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
:: To always have you by my side.

3. Whose butt would you like to kick?
:: Nobody?

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?
:: There's so much I would like to do. But first, give an offering unto the Lord.

5. Will you u fall in love with your best friend?
:: Definitely.

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
:: Too hard to judge. Because I like the feeling of loving someone, and it's a blessing to me to be able to give out love and also because I'm lucky to be able to find someone to love. And then being loved by someone is also a blessing to us. At least we know someone out there loves us and accepts us for who we are.

7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?
:: For as long as I can.

8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
:: Keep my love for him to myself until I'm ready to move on. But it's a if right? ;)

9. If you like to act with someone, who will it be? your gf/bf or an actress/actor?
:: boyfriend.

10. Will you invite for Ex bf/gf to your wedding dinner?
:: If I have one, definitely. I would also want him to be happy and make sure he marries someone he loves and he's happy with. If not, I won't approve! haha

11. How would you see yourself in ten years time?
:: Being me. (: Living, laughing, crying and enjoying every bit of blessings.

12. What's your fear?
:: I shall speak no fear of mine.

13. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?
:: Married but poor.

15. Would you give all in a relationship?
:: What say you?

16. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
:: The one that loves me?

17. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing the someone has done?
:: Yes. But sometimes it might take a while.

18.Do you prefer being single or having a relationship?
:: Being in a relationship.

I want to tag..that someone. ;)

so, is this where boredom took me tonight?

simply because.

Father we ask of You this day, Come and heal our land
Knit our hearts together, That your glory may be seen in us
Then the world will know, That Jesus Christ is Lord

Let us be one voice, That glorifies Your name
Let us be one voice, Declaring that You reign
Let us be one voice, In love and harmony
And we pray, O God, grant us unity

Now is the time for you and I
To join our hearts in praise
That the name of Jesus
Will be lifted high above the earth
Then the world will know
That Jesus Christ is Lord

We sang this song during worship in cell group last night. And am I glad to say that this song spoke to me. Not only that, but also because it somehow was connected to the discussion we had. We learned about friends, to commit and to help them in times of need. Notice the words and lines in bold? Those are the words that spoke to me. They reminded me again that we're a family, a body and as cliché as it sounds, we're all in this together.

These words-us, we, our; they bind us together, they break down the walls between us. And oh Lord, knit our hearts together, that we may be close and bonded to bring glory to Your name, to praise You and worship You and to Love you with all our heart, soul, mind and strength.

And then we learned and discussed about friends. When you're in deep trouble, friends willingly be your hero's. But if they are unable to save you, they'll accompany you and get in trouble with you. (:

Indeed, yesterday night was not only a night of new hopes, new life lessons learned but also a brand new beginning. because all of a sudden, I felt the urge to apologize and say sorry for all that I've done and I'm more than happy because I did what I felt I needed to do and I'm going to forget about it. We had a prayer time for each other and thank You Lord, all glory and praises to You! Ended the night with the usual fellowship. ;)

boy, was the trip back home hilarious! Imagine two tall boys sitting on a space designated for one person. Yup, and then we took pictures whilst cramming ourselves like sardines-typical us!

Before I end this, this is a shoutout to the friends I've known and I have;

Every single one of you have been a great blessing in my life. Not only did you walk in and maybe out of my life, you've left footprints that I'll never get to erase. yes, my brain has this special memory stick that saves almost every of my friends but if the next time, perhaps 10 years later, if you come up to me and I don't seem to remember, please kindly remind me, will you? Don't worry, I'll try my very best to remember all of you. (:

Also thank you for every single moment of happiness, every drop of joy and every dash of love I've been blessed with.

to the youth; we're all in this together. may we be as close as we are and grow closer by the days.

to the best friends; you guys know too much, you'll always be best friends.

to the cousin who is also the blog buddy, camera buddy, pillow talk buddy, the second one who understands me the most besides the family; you're wonderful! I'm so blessed to have you as a little cousin sister. =)

and to the special friend; you're amazing! (:

your smile spoke for you.

Being one of the only two girls out of a bunch of guys in class today wasn't that bad, in fact it was can i say... fun? Yes, it was. It was exciting, entertaining and hilarious with a bit of humiliation. You don't know what sense from nonsense this people can think of. (:

Bio was amazingly fun because we had our time together, asking each other questions on bio facts. okay, more like the questions from the girls and answers from the boys. but nontheless, I enjoyed. And also because --- you know why.

And then being the not-so-nerdy-pure-science-students we are, we played charades for a while..My goodness, something funny and mind blowing happened.

*boy 2 whispers sentence to girl 2*
*girl 2 tries to act the word out*
*girl 2 does something that blew our minds away*
*girl 1 guesses*
*boy 1 and boy 3 keeps quiet, pretending to not know a thing*
*boy 4 wonders*
*girl 1 gets half of the sentence right*
*all laugh. oh my goodness can be heard! silent screams and laughter starts filling in*
*girl 2 laughs and blames boy 2*
*girl 2 continues acting*
*boy 4 tries to guess*
*girl 1 gets it right*
*boy 1 asks girl 1 a question referring to the answer*
*girl 1 gets a momentarily furious feeling and feels like hitting him*
but, girl 1 still loves you. (:

yes, they're my friends. and I treasure them with all I have.

today is a Friday.

and Friday's are our magical day.
to you, -insertmyinitial- you know what i mean.

because it ain't raining tonight.

today's just great and I couldn't ask for more. All thanks and praises goes to Him who arts above. (:

so I went to school today like any other normal day. but truth be told, I had a hunch that there would be something extraordinary about today. classes were on and off due to the amount of classmates present. And Ju came to school today after i-don't-know-how-long. =)

Surprisingly, what I thought was just a hunch the day before came true. And I thank Him for that.
Really, really am glad and thankful. No words can express my gratitude. Because not only that happened,

the blizzards started clearing up and as the sun light shone in, the rainbow started to appear. Although the rainbow may not be as clear and colourful as I had always wished for it to be, I'm sure it is a good sign. & you'll be my sunshine, always. (:

The Lord never fails me. He never fails to carry me through my weakest times, never fails to brighten up my darkness, never fails to bring happiness in my life when sadness starts pouring in, never fails to take away my doubts and worries, and there's just so much more that He has done for me. He has provided, cared and loved me despite the things that I've done. He, is my best friend. And it feels like we're always on a never ending phone call, without needing to pay the phone bill. Thank you Lord. You're my provider, my shelter, my Father.

today, despite having that uncontrollable feeling of something, I had my time. I don't know how to string those words into sentences neither do I know how to express every single tinge I have to you, but I just want to say thank you and ---

you'll always be mine.
;)

i remember.

you: remember this. jauh di mata, dekat di hati.

me: haha yea, like absence makes the heart grow fonder.

and there's so much more that made me smile.

your 18th chapter. (:

as you flip the pages in the book of your life,
I hope you'll pick up happiness and love along the way.
Don't forget to stop along the way,
for you never know what's in store for you.
Perhaps there would be presents and surprises unexpected,
but I hope you'll find that love that you long for. (:

Happy 18th birthday Sherina!

Thank you for all the times we had together, the memories we shared and being a part of this big family. Though at times we may reach certain disagreement, but it's good to know that at least through each other, we can share opinions and thoughts, expanding our horizon and learning through life together. And maybe at times I've been mischievous and naughty, but it's all of no bad intentions. It's just for the fun together! ;)

And with this, I hope that you'll have that wish of yours come true, that bucket of happiness always filled, that perhaps wounded heart and sorrows mended, and every friendship well knit together. I hope you'll have an amazing and more wonderful 18th year!

"when stingray's find their soul mate, they'll stick together; forever." (:

I have doubts, again.

you don't know how many times I turn to look at you today.

you don't know how many times I had to take a deep breath and let out a long sigh, trying to shove my thoughts away.

I wish I could just go up to you and pour everything out, but I know you'll deny and ask me to stop being sensitive.

Can't I be the upset one, for once?

you know, it hurts to see those happening right in front of my eyes, what more seeing you --
don't you ever care about how I feel?

Blame me, I know!
I guess there's nothing more I can do. ):

you, boyy! I'm sad not mad.

grey lines.

You don't want to read this. This is out of randomness and momentarily boredom. (:
The words are all connected based on my very own interpretation and what comes to mind first.

comfort-pillows-comforter-cold-sun-sweat-water-droplets-morning dew-sun rise-sun set-mountain top-rocks-winter-spring-flowers-yellow-dress-floral-green-trees-woods-lonely-shadows-shade-big trees-leaves-apple-worms-squishy-gummy bears-australia-sheeps-wool-white-black-dark-paper-wood-brown-skirt-shirt-iron-metal-potassium-palmitic acid-alkaline-hydroxide-oxygen-breath-lungs-smoke-death-blood-pain-happiness-smile-love-you. ;)

I could go on forever, but that's a good ending.

you made it real.

I was wishing, praying and hoping that a miracle would happen.

so, I made a wish yesterday morning and prayed that if it came true, then all the nonsense I have at the back of my mind are of nothing but plain nonsense.

& I'm a happy kid now!

yes, it came true; with just a matter of a few seconds before I nearly gave up, just before I left.

It may seem like a little girl's innocent wishes and thoughts, but this heart knows the truth and it feels like a fresh beginning.

black sugar paper.

I just remembered, somewhere last year, I received 23 messages as a form of scolding/advising/threatening from someone. It felt more like being scolded.

***

Jealousy has a very high potential in making someone go way above their limits.

It kills.

***

Perhaps someday, I'll realise that I wasn't cut out for this and I would get a clearer view of everything.

someday.

***

It's that time again,

wishing for a miracle to happen.

spend the night away.

the day before today;

heureux sei ヵ月 årsdagen, mon cher!

walk down the lane of life together.

snapped out of the daze.

how am I to tell you the truth?
That I've had enough, heard enough, seen enough and am tired of being used as an alternative way out.

I'm tired of being used as an escape route.

I'm tired of being labeled your accomplice.

Maybe it's time to put a full stop in this.

Because lately I have heard more than I expected-both from you and about you, enough to last me for at least a few centuries. It's sad to be in this kind of situation, especially after today's sermon on cultivating Godly friendships. Aren't we all taught to choose our friends wisely, to hang out and stay around the ones of good influence? I have never thought of you as a bad influence, remember that. Also, advices and words have been said which I have denied till now. I tried to stand up for you, and to speak on your behalf. But I guess you proved me wrong at certain points.

You're not that much of a bad person either, it's just that in my opinion, you're not that easy as a person. I know it's human nature to be jealous, to be moody, to be selfish or even to feel as if being neglected. But, have you forgotten that we're all humans and we too can do the same? Just that we all learn to control our feelings and be as happy and contented with what we are blessed with. Maybe you don't realise, but you often have your mood swings and truth be told, I find it hard to entertain you anymore. I just don't have the strength and energy to stay on and bear with you. I pity those you have bullied, you have scolded, you have said things behind their backs and even those that you complain about.

There's something else that I am not comfortable with.

I mean, what's so nice about imitating people? We are all different individuals, with different style and designation. Can't you just stick to being yourself and stop interfering in mine? Are friends made just to interfere our lives? I personally am sure it isn't, what say you?

Though you might be a little less fortunate than the majority of us, but you are also way fortunate than the majority of us. Don't waste energy to complain and spot the weaknesses in those that care for you, return their love and care instead. Trust me, it's more worth it. And they'll appreciate you more.

Do you know why the above paragraph was said to you? Because, perhaps sub-consciously, you have hurt those that cares for you with your words, expressions and behaviors. Not just once, but umpteenth times. And you always label me as your accomplice. Which I am not, I'm just a spectator from the sidewalks when I'm not one of those that you've hurt.

I've had enough and there are more words left unspoken, more sentences to you left hanging.

Running away, hiding in the bush or even being lost in your radar isn't an escape, neither an option nor a solution.

I admit, I'm afraid to confront you.

To stay on or to take a risk?

la vôtre

there's nothing in this world,
there's not another boy that could make me feel so sweet.

yesterday;
i wish, i wish upon a shooting star,
wonder whether the star got my wish tonight.

I'm sure the star heard my wish last night.

you're my favourite hello.

I have made up my mind.

This time, I hope it'll be a surprise that will take your breath away.

tell me something i don't know.

is today just made for me to reminisce about yesterday's memories and remember the past?

September 12,2006
what does it means if someone messages u daily even if there's nothing?

September 08,2006

for only 1 month, I'll be the same age as my friend..that friend will turn 16 next month..but,for now before that friend's birthday..i shall be the same age as that friend...appreciate this 1 month..but,no matter how..i will always be younger than that friend. sigh.

p.s* u guys know who is that friend ?

August 28,2006

i go to sleep with imaginations,i am accompanied by dreams when i sleep and i wake up with nothing. -m3.-

dreams that come through when I'm sleeping are mostly impossible to come through but some really did come through..those really sweet and those that i really want didn't come through..so,i guess I'll have to just continue dreaming and go on to imagine those wonderful things that maybe would not take place in my life..

-continue to wish upon the stars or just dream-
happy dreaming to me.

***
-full of dreams tonight.- i miss someone.

August 25,2006
你明白吗？

我一直都很想跟你讲我心里的话。

有时，我觉得你和我之间有些不可讲解的东西。可是，你总是那么的安静..老是把心情藏在心里。这样我真得很难明白你。

我已经尽力了。我真的真的真的很想坦白的跟你讲事实，但是，我怕你知道事实以后，你会远离我。

你可不可以主动来跟我讲话？每次都是我主动找你。。只有几次你自己来跟我谈天。你知道吗？你明白我的心情吗？

--
and the above were just being copied and paste from my old blog.

it feels funny knowing that all these aren't the important issues in my life currently.
but, I'll still treasure it all. (:

wear me a trench coat.

of the tears, flashbacks and memories..

how much does it hurt to be a sentimentalist?

I was studying until a shiny rectangle box caught my attention. That box had always been there, right in the middle of my study table, against that milky colored wall. but I just hadn't got the interest to open it up and browse through it. Until today, that I laid aside my book and my pencil and carefully lifted the box off it's original place. I knew it's content, but I just had a feeling of going through it one by one, again.

Lying inside that box were all photographs of friends, family and mostly loved ones, from when i was a baby till now. I remember why I kept them aside, because those photos were precious ones. they were photos I wanted to keep them by my side. And so I did, I went through them one by one as my favourite songs played in the background. Then, I had this sudden urge of rereading my old diary.

It really surprises me on how much I've been through and the fact that I've forgotten almost all of it despite it happening just 2 years ago. And I must have been living in a fog that I totally didn't realise that I took someone for granted. someone, a close friend, a friend who was always watching out for me and tying to help me out when I was in times of need. now I understand why I was asked that question, that question which my answer was a total let down to that someone.

I didn't know that I would have changed so much, met more amazing people, fall for someone else, done things I never thought I would do and be a whole new me.

I must have a magic drawer because besides my old diary, my collection of Archie comics, my CD's, my knick-knacks and the likes, I still have space for my old notes from primary school. I'm pretty sure everybody or anybody would have long thrown away those little notes written by 'i don't care much 12 year olds', except for me. So, I went through them again, rereading them one by one.

Today must have been added with a heavy dose of curiosity because despite trying to catch up on my syllabus, I felt the need to look through pictures, diary and old notes.

And I'm glad to say, I feel good.

cœur brisé

it hurts, I hate it.

it's killing me on the inside.

... and I'm going to hug my teddy tight.

monday mazes.

I would say, today's class was very different.

first off, we were the only form 5 class present in school today; with the 14 of us. we were allocated in the 'abandoned' class which is a classroom that we seldom use for classes. anyway, the class was dirty, dusty, messy & was practically a mosquito home. Lucky those guys who wore long pants & those who wore baju kurung. as for me, the mosquitoes were having a feast. ):

we had a little chem test, without a teacher.

after recess, was modern maths. teacher was late past her scheduled period & so we had 2 free periods. we were given some snacks from our class teacher, so guess what we did? we ate, read newspaper, did some extra work and chat the 2 periods off while the form 4's were having their finals and the form 3's with their PMR's. (:

I guess we're not that much of a budak baik, what more a nerd?
especially with SPM around the corner.

but, it was fun and definitely worth it, at least to me. :)

***

all the best to those in the midst of PMR!

ivan, the grown up cousin: 你说，十五岁的你，要努力读书。那你一定要努力加油，好吗？

joel goh: i don't think you'll get to see this, but as written in the card to you; our monkey king is definitely smart and we know you can do it. our very own joel einstein! after pmr, we shall feast on cheese, okay? xD

zhen bi: don't worry, just trust in Him and He will provide for you. We're sure you can do it too!

and to all our prefect juniors, all of you have been wonderful! All the best and take good care of yourselves. =)

***

the weekend was, let's just say... unexpected.

very unexpected, in two very different ways.

i guess, i just got to be ready for more of these surprises.

from here to there.

dear xxx,

I'm pretty sure you're in love all over again!

***

here we go again. I can't help to have that sort of feeling, that feeling only you know that I would have. And I was convincing myself that things weren't as I thought it was.

I guess, last night, you proved me right.

It's not like what I thought.





And again today, what's the matter with me?

because i'm following.

because i'm following you;
never letting go.

we'll make it a slow walk to enjoy and appreciate every moment of it,
but remember to tell me when you would like to let things run at a faster pace;
promise?

these sentimental notes to you.

I want to dream, write and write
and then drift away into my own fairytale,
into our fairytale.

because that's the second best place I long to be.

the best place?
you know where.

gone with the wind.

I caught the flu bugs,
mr. ex- assistant head prefect. (:
i think i know why, because i was there during chemistry, during our chem test;
while you were sneezing away, trying to get your head into the paper.

but it's okay, because we have tomorrow off!
time to kill 'em bugs!
---------------------

the day before tomorrow, the day after yesterday; today.

today to you;
you were there at the end of my chosen path.
I'm glad I chose to walk down that road,
when I could have continued to walk down in my old lane;
but that's why I found you.

18日にしている

you're 18 today! (:

Happy happy blessed birthday Aaron!

God bless you always & may you have a very amazing 18th year.

we were once little kids,
together; we played hide and seek.
though those were in the past,
I hope you had a blast.

;)

it's all blue inside.

I don't think you know.

but you're definitely trying to steal my teddy bear.

hush now.

Friday night was great! A dinner specially prepared by each of the youth except a certain someone who got his part of the food from somewhere. It was a pot bless, if you're wondering. So,we each made a dish or two and brought it along. It was a good 'family' dinner, with that usual long table style, under the moonlight with the sound of us chattering away and fits of laughter every now and then. It's been a while since it felt so good, so warm, so nice.

After dinner, all 13 of us sat down for pictionary. and my goodness, you would never believe these people; screaming, laughing away when one of the groups lands on the 'all play box'. It's exciting and exhausting, if you ask me, especially with these people. just had to highlight that word. (:

Saturday was yet another Saturday; just another Saturday.

and today's a Sunday. Isn't it supposed to be sunny? Guess things just don't work out this way.

had lunch with the youth after church. and and and

& some three of us including me teared while eating.
want to take a guess to why were we tearing?

***

au clair de lune, je vais rester par vous.
nous allons passer ici, les étoiles jusqu'à la perd de scintiller.

dee dum dum.

for one's reading pleasure alone;

1. What is the relationship of you and her?
cousin sisters.blog buddy.the other twin.

2. Your 5 impressions toward her?
-finicky eater.
-avid reader.
-vocab police.
-wonderful friend.
-amazing cousin.

3. The most memorable things she has done for you.
entertaining all my sudden meaningless quirks, staying up late just to talk..and the list goes on. (:

4. The most memorable things she have said to you?
"I, er, uh, well, um, uh, love, er, well, you." xD (i had to copy and paste that.)

5. If she becomes your lover, you will...
I'm pretty sure it will never happen. no if. =)

6. If she becomes your enemy, you will...
steal all her books.

7. If she becomes your lover, she has to improve on...
being more masculine?

8. If she becomes your enemy, the reason is...
I doodled in her books and perhaps revealed her little 'treasure'.

9. The most desirable thing to do on her is?
-minta maaf, siaran tergendala.-

10. The overall impression of her is...
refer to the equation in your birthday card! (:

11. How do you think the people around you will feel about you?
uhm..i really don't know.

12. The character of you for yourself is?
puzzling.

13. On contrary, the character you hate about yourself is?
for me to know, and for you not to find out.

14. The most ideal person that you wanna be is?
I'm contented with being me, myself and I. ;)

15. For the people who care about and like you, say something about them.
They're the source of happiness & warmth.

16. 10 friends to tag
all my imaginary friends.

further part of the tag have been removed because -

secret diary.

to the gentle lapping of the waves, will i fall into your arms again?

definitely.

loves,
elisa.

the friendship knot.

reunited.