maybe i should wonder off someday.

to start off,what you readers are going to read is going to be pretty unpleasant. and don't bother guessing who or what I'm talking about because i don't wish for people to know. but if you get what I'm trying to say, just keep it to yourself, would you? (:

you know sometimes how it feels when you are assigned to a job by someone and that someone asked you to fully take charge of that responsibility but later to find that that someone is always getting in your way, controlling everything, changing all your decisions & instructing you around when you were assigned by he/she to be FULLY IN CHARGE of the whole job? you know,it hurts that you asked me and another someone to be responsible for this project and later on you try and interfere in everything we do? not try to, but literally taking over indirectly. and before we even started, you said it's all up to the both of us and we are supposed to delegate tasks to the rest of the group while you'll just sit back and watch.do you remember that? it's okay if you don't, but maybe the one who was meant to sit back and watch should have been me, not you. since you wanted to take charge of it with your plans, your decisions and your way.
and when i was down with bad flu and cough, you didn't bother but told me of others whom you care for more. well, i know I'm not a loved one to you.
but it's okay now, although you have always been like that, not once, not twice but countless times. because this might be my last, and as the title says..

maybe i should wonder off someday.

you can have it your way after that. and don't worry, i won't come back looking for you. and if you are reading this, then I'm sorry but i really needed to type this out to release all that have been accumulated inside for a long time now. & then there was the present happenings, i was just doing my job quietly without disturbing you or your loved ones; but you looked at me as if i stole your entire life. I smiled, but you just looked at me angrily. I don't know why you did that and i do not wish to know. you can go on being your royal highness, i will not interfere in your royal business or your royal life. because i have mine. and maybe i don't have nice pretty stuff like you do, or a life where everyone likes and spoils you or something that you have and i don't. but i know one thing for sure, i don't need your life to have a life of my own. because I'm contented with mine now and i have my loved ones too.
I'm really serious about this because i know that if i don't confront the problem or settle this once and for all, worst things are going to happen. and i really really do not wish to go through such unnecessary difficulties. i don't know what plans you're having, what secret you're hiding but you can do all you wish to now because i might just disappear for a while.and this time, I kid you not.

because all I need is a break, a break free from all these happenings and illusions.

to that unknown place, see you soon.